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1 Question Every Single Woman Should Answer for Herself– Not Everybody Else

Single women should answer the question for themselves, not everybody else.


“So, are you dating?”



Ugh. How loud do you groan when you hear that question? Do you route a path to the nearest exit or scan the area for objects you can use as a weapon or a shield?



To a bystander, the inquiry might seem like friendly, idle chit chat.  The problem with idle chit chat about dating is you can never be sure whether the idle will turn into The Inquisition.



You remember The Inquisition, right? That’s where fun-loving religious leaders tortured the heretics who did not adhere to their rituals and beliefs.



Kind of like being single in a marriage-first-last-always society.



Unless the asker is a stranger, it’s obvious, to you anyway, that he or she really wants know whether or not you are in a relationship and why are you still single???



The question itself, however, is like the riddle of the Sphinx, if the Sphinx was not the site of virgin sacrifices. Any answer can be right or wrong, depending on the person and the place.

5 WTF Trends I Checked Out For You. You’re Welcome.

Vaginal Steaming? Oh No



Before you ask, these are all real things that real Americans do. Nothing here is fictitious. Names have not been changed to protect the ridiculous.



I took five for the team.



Ok, not all of these trends are completely ridiculous, and only one or two will result in bodily injury. However, the location and self-inflicted nature of such injuries might require explanation or hibernation, until the affects heal, fade or both.



Despite their label, fads tend to be more flash in the pan than herald of change. New fashions or movements or diets that are good for you endure, like dark chocolate, or resurrect, like reverse bobs. The rest are gone faster than you can say Kardashian. We can all ignore them with impunity.



Fortunately, trendsetting is the domain of the too cool, too young, too dumb or too poor. Tattoos? Shredded jeans? Designer drugs? Grown-ups prefer artwork on walls, shredded wheat and medicine from CVS.



On the Sweet Side of 40, you want to watch and decide whether or not to adopt the latest craze, instead of going crazy keeping up with the people who keep up with those Kardashians. After all, trendy behavior, well executed, can make you simultaneously stand out and fit in.



You just like to be sure any new holes in your head, morsels in your mouth or clothing on your back is a better idea than wearing Reeboks and a Mohawk to prom.



Read on, sweet friend, and decide for yourself. I’m pretty sure you will thank me when you’re done.

The Joys of Not Dating: 15 Side Benefits of Staying Home More Often

relaxing alone in the tub


Are you dating?



Did your answer start with, “Uh…?” It’s a tougher question than we think, tougher (though no less rude) than “are you dating anyone special?” I know I hem and haw when someone asks if I am dating– mainly because the definition of dating is confusing and can make a girl feel bad.



For example, does dating mean anything other than married, engaged or co-habitating? Or is dating having a semi-significant other you see most Saturday nights? Is it having a first date on the calendar?



Shouldn’t intention be part of the definition, or at least the question: Do you WANT to date? Is dating your goal? Then, dating might be actively searching for a companion, seeking fix-ups and generally doing what we do to attract a paramour, whether or not the hoped-for dinner, movie and fireworks result.



Being brave enough to set up a, or profile surely counts as a “yes, I am dating.” Suffering through nine thousand eHarmony questions shouldn’t lead to the further torment of being reminded, in public, that your efforts have not yet been rewarded.


(It’s not my fault computers don’t “get me.”)


Sex Policies Not Just for Valentine’s Day (or Valentines)

Candy, roses, wine for Valentine's


For an occasion supposedly about romance, Valentine’s Day seems a lot more like a celebration of the pleasures of the flesh. Sensual floral scents. Mouth-watering, lip-smacking sweets. Champagne, spirits and other fruits of the vine.  Stimulating, satiating sex.



Count me in.



From where I sit—my sofa – none of those indulgences requires a duo. In fact, my solo V-day 2015 includes:



Rose’s from Trader Joe’s. I’m no stranger to buying a bouquet for myself but this tiny pot was irresistible and might even last til Easter.



Truffles from La Chocolaterie. A friend left some fancy candy in my mailbox. I guess he fancies me. I fancy Peanut M&Ms.  I’m a milk chocolate kind of gal.



Prosecco- my bubbly of choice and only 10% alcohol by volume. (Though it’s usually the volume that gets me, not the % alcohol.)



Sex. I will leave this up to your imagination because, barring the intervention of an armed, infant angel, I will also be leaving it up to mine as well.



50 Nutcracker Thoughts Single Women Dance to at Holiday Parties

single women and christmas nutcrackers

  The thoughts that dash, prance and blitz through the mind of a single woman at holiday events are not dear. No, they are more like Ghosts of Christmas Parties Past.   Dickens’s own ghost was described as "being now a thing with one arm, now with one leg, now with twenty legs, now a pair of legs without a head, now a head without a body…”   Being single at a soiree can seem like that in December. Or anytime. Single women are doubly blessed to feel both invisible as a ghost and as conspicuous as a dude in red velvet.   No wonder you go a little nuts or crack up. Every year, you try your best to dance like a good sugar plum to...

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